My son is only going to be 2 years old this May, and I can safely say that I know the secret to being a good parent already… That’s Right! I Said It! …Let me build up to the moment… It’s been a while since I last took some time out of my schedule to sit down and write. I used to find pleasure in writing this blog–not only because I enjoy other people reading my work, but really because I enjoy writing and then getting to look back on the journey I’ve been on as a first time father. But life got in the way. With all the traveling the globe for work, the 16-hour workdays, going to grad school, finishing certification courses, starting my own business, marketing, networking, and everything else that being an adult brings to the table… time spreads extremely thin… extremely fast. I can’t believe how time works. They say “time flies when you’re having fun.” Other known clichés are, “it all happened in a split second,” “in the blink of an eye,” “where did the time go,” or even, “in two shakes of a lambs tail.” The concept that time moves so fast that we are literally unable to piece together the memories of what has happened in the course of it, is sometimes a blessing and a curse. There really isn’t enough time in a day… it truly is the the truest cliché ever created. It’s hard. Being an adult is hard. Being Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Parenthood, The Puzzle Piece and tagged be a great parent, be present, being a great parent, being present, live, live in the moment, living in the moment, newdad, no time, not enough time, parent, parenting secrets, the secret, the secret of parenting, timewith 2 comments.
As I begin this journey as a father, I sit and reflect on what it means to be a father. I guess I could start by reflecting on all the lessons I’ve learned about how to be a father, from what I learned about knowing my own. My father has been dead now for over 15 years now, but I can literally say that every day I use something that I’ve learned from him, such as: I learned to be honest with people. My father was a hustler. He sold fake jewelry to tourists. He took small businesses to court for bullshit lawsuits that he knew he’d win for a quick few thousand bucks. He told me he’d “be right back”, as he left me in the car to keep myself occupied anywhere up to an hour, with not even keys in the car to keep the radio on. He picked me up three days late as he left me to stay with his cousins, while he had guns and knives pulled on him, as well as spending time in jail awaiting bail. All while playing it “cool” in front of me as he picked me up as if nothing happened. I learned respect and how to be polite. My father was old school south. And I mean children-are-to-be-seen-not-heard kinda old school south. I didn’t mind so much because when I was with him, I did have a lot of cousins and friends to hang out with, but when I walked Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Dissapointment, Parenthoodwith 6 comments.
According to science, we have 5 days left till the predicted due date. That’s roughly 120 hours, give or take a lifetime. So naturally I should be feeling some sort of way right about now. Well I do… … I feel uneasy. While I’ve been jumping through hoops these last few months to create this space to write about my thoughts, redecorate the house, establish the nursery, finish my Bachelors degree, apply for a Master’s program, pay off all the bills, make sure insurance and health issues are in order, and take care of preggo pants (the wife)– I haven’t really sat down and expressed my deepest fears with anyone. And since this blog is self-righteously named The Scared Dad, it’s time to address what I’m most scared of. I was talking to a friend today whom, like many, is anxiously awaiting the birth of my child. She and I go way back, and she and her husband had just had a child of their own. This child changed them, and changed their dynamic and brought out the best in them. Although I’ve seen this with my own eyes, I’m not saying this with my words or observation. Saying that their child brings out the best in them, is their own declaration. Both hubby and wife have rejoiced in the life of their child and have told me many times how much of a good thing the baby is to them both as individuals and as a family. Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Fearwith 8 comments.
I don’t trust my friends And in fairness, they shouldn’t trust me either. Now, before I start pissing people off, I actually trust my friends with my life… and because I trust them with my life, it’s with them that I’ve experienced some really wild stories that only we would understand, and that’s where this all turns sour. My friends know absolutely everything that I’ve done, things that I want nobody in the world to know. There are way too many stories that make sense to us, and are hilarious… TO US… that other people just don’t find funny. Hell… While thinking about the things we’ve done, I’m like “what the fuck were we thinking?” Mostly… “what the fuck was I thinking…” and I’m sure my friends can attest to that. So, why is it that I make this statement of not being able to trust my friends? Well let me put it this way… My friends are awesome. We are pretty much family. We fight, we laugh, we camp, we care… we’re family. This last weekend they decided to all get together and throw me a baby shower the man’s way. BBQ, beer, and poker with money–not diapers. But what’s special about this is that we don’t all get together like this often anymore, because we all have our own lives now. Most are parents, some of multiple kids, some of us are still students, some are full-time dads, and everyone has full-time responsibilities whether it makes them money Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Those Odd moments...with no comments yet.
Recently, I started thinking if Paps and I would be doing our children a disservice by not allowing them to get use to using electronics. Like, would it make them the equivalent of someone who is an illiterate adult once they get to college? And I’m not just talking, using Word or Excel…Paint– I’m talking technology; X-box, Playstation, Wii-U, tablets, smartphones, Google Glass, Twitter, Tumblr, FB (or whatever comes out by the time they’re able to grasp the concept of social media). *Note* I’m so disheveled by this topic, it may be hard for me to keep focus More and more do I become more conflicted with the issue of technology and children. I am a technician by trade. I L-O-V-E tech stuff. I love gidgets, gadgets, thingamabobs, new internet stuff, apps, media sources, social sites, new gaming devices, warfare items, space stuff… whatever it is, I’m interested and I want to play with it. That had to start somewhere… and it did. It started while I was in the 3rd grade when we had these old Apple Macintosh SE Desktop Computers that had 2 colors on them, green and greener, on a screen relative to the size of cell phones now… I took an after school class to learn DOS manipulation. However, the functions that a 9-year-old could do at that time were very elementary. Shit, personal computers were a practically brand new technology, and I know I’m showing my age but that’s what it was. But I loved that stuff because Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Getting Ready, Parenthoodwith 15 comments.