It Takes a Village
Just this morning I came across a blog post about a woman who was arrested for letting her 9-year old play unsupervised at the park… a public park. The charge was “unlawful conduct towards a child,” and really all the facts surrounding it are not really needed to be said such as the mother’s color, job, social class… however, in the articles, all of that is mentioned. What is important is this… an adult approached this 9-year old child, asked where her mother is, found out her mother was at work, and then deemed it appropriate to call the police resulting in the end result of her child be taken into custody into the department of social services. I am a father of just 2-months now. I have no extensive background on the whole picture of parenting. I don’t claim to be an expert when it comes to raising children. In fact I bite my tongue often when I think that “someone’s doing it wrong,” because it’s not my place to say anything… unless that child is in eminent danger. But you know what I am… a human being. That’s right. I’m a 32-year-old human being. I was a child once. I learned to ride bikes, and was aloud a ride bike down the street and in our cul-de-sac unsupervised. Then I met up friends, and we climbed trees, and went to the park. I had a skateboard, which I rode by myself to a friend’s house… or just to get an Continue Reading →
Posted in Dissapointment, Parenthoodwith 18 comments.
Am I My Father’s Son? An Ode to my Father this Father’s Day
As I begin this journey as a father, I sit and reflect on what it means to be a father. I guess I could start by reflecting on all the lessons I’ve learned about how to be a father, from what I learned about knowing my own. My father has been dead now for over 15 years now, but I can literally say that every day I use something that I’ve learned from him, such as: I learned to be honest with people. My father was a hustler. He sold fake jewelry to tourists. He took small businesses to court for bullshit lawsuits that he knew he’d win for a quick few thousand bucks. He told me he’d “be right back”, as he left me in the car to keep myself occupied anywhere up to an hour, with not even keys in the car to keep the radio on. He picked me up three days late as he left me to stay with his cousins, while he had guns and knives pulled on him, as well as spending time in jail awaiting bail. All while playing it “cool” in front of me as he picked me up as if nothing happened. I learned respect and how to be polite. My father was old school south. And I mean children-are-to-be-seen-not-heard kinda old school south. I didn’t mind so much because when I was with him, I did have a lot of cousins and friends to hang out with, but when I walked Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Dissapointment, Parenthoodwith 6 comments.
Child Care-less
Dear America, Why do you hate parents? Respectfully, Robert So I’ve mentioned before that I travel for work. I get to see all the glorious places that most will only see in post cards, and I get to eat all the glorious food that you only see on Food Network. I get to experience traditions and customs that you only see on the travel channel, but there is one thing I will never get to experience… Other countries’ benefits. That’s right Americans, we may be home of the free and proud and stuff, but we are definitely paying a price for that. And please don’t get me wrong… I didn’t serve 10 years in the Marine Corps so I could bash on the good ol’ U S of A in a blog post. This is specifically about child care. Once I found out about my wife being pregnant, I immediately started asking all the relevant questions… specifically those that pertain to work… 1) How does the insurance cover this birth? 2) If my wife has her own insurance, whose gets used for the hospital care? 3) Which insurance would the baby fall under? 4) Will I need paperwork from the job site in order to start the process? but most importantly, 5) How does the paternity leave work? (that link goes to a more credible source aka Huffington Post, if you don’t want to take my word for it) So here’s a real quick breakdown. What you need to understand Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Dissapointment, Fear, Getting Ready, Parenthood, Those Odd moments...with 32 comments.
Where did the time go?
There just aren’t enough hours in a day. So cliché. But shit man… there are simply not enough hours in a day, or let alone… days in a weekend. I thought about this greatly today as I finished the biggest portion of the painting of the baby’s nursery. I pulled off the painters tape, I sat down on the stool that once held the paint bucket, and then I stared at all the small mistakes from the paint seeping under the small pockets of air in the tape that I was now going to have to take more time out of my life to fix… Why couldn’t it have just come out right the first time? God knows I tried–and tried hard. But as I wasted, now, a second weekend in that slowly developing, painter’s nightmare of a nursery, I can’t begin to list the full checklist of the other obligations that I had to either irresponsibly push-off, or make a conscious decision to do at a later date. For instance: Fix my lawn mower. Last weekend my dogs thought it would be a good idea to chew through the pull cord on my lawn mower instead of play with the dozen(s) of toys they already have (or rip out more branches on my rose bushes like they usually do), so instead of moving forward with the plans I had of re-seeding the lawn and taking charge of my back yard again (something I could only do because I was… was ahead on my Continue Reading →
Posted in Dissapointment, Fear, Getting Readywith 12 comments.
Honey, Have You Seen My Pregnancy Pants?
Yeah… Mine. Let’s face it. The sympathy weight is no myth. As a 31 year old man, I am once again afraid to step on a scale. I haven’t been scared to step on a scale since returning from 30 days of leave while I was in the Marine Corps. I’ve always been on the heavy side (teetering on my max allowed weight in the Marine Corps), and even on the heavier side as a civilian, but I’ve never hit over 300 lbs. And that’s where I’m scared I’m at. GRANTED… I am 6’5″, so it’s not like I look like Black Santa… but I can definitely feel that I’ve put on some lbs. (How did we even get “lbs” from pounds?” Just a question) I can feel it in my ankles. I can feel it in my knees. I can feel it the tightening of my pants and shorts, in the shortness of breath, in the tightness in my shirts. And the fucked up part about it is, I KNOW I’VE PUT ON WEIGHT. I don’t need to step on a scale to know this. My tits look like my wife’s at this point. So why haven’t I done anything about it? Seriously? Why haven’t I? Well like any other person who vows to make a life change, I hit these barriers (which I’ve learned while doing homework, is a legitimate psychological term) that always seem to just keep me just way too busy; things like cleaning up what Continue Reading →
Posted in Dissapointment, Fear, Getting Ready, Those Odd moments...with 10 comments.