Baby Announcement Gone Sour

“Should I go get another pregnancy test?” That’s what my wife asked me sometime during the last week of September.  She asked about getting another one because two she had already taken some weeks prior had failed; but her boobs had been sore and kept her in pain.  I had already assumed the possibility of her being pregnant because she’d been complaining of the pain for probably two weeks at that point, plus she hadn’t had a visit from Aunt Flo (but we attributed that to a car accident we had been in a few weeks prior)… Oh, also because of some physical bodily changes I’d noticed… but I won’t put her business out there.  Lets just say, if my nipples become girthier, I might fear that I may be pregnant. I offered to go to CVS and go get the test with her, but she went without me.  It was a school night, so I was just relaxing on the couch watching whatever we watch to dumb ourselves down before bed.  Once she came back home she disappeared for about 10 minutes, then returned but went straight to the kitchen and hid from me.  Now I knew that my Spidey sense was 100% right. I asked her, “well, are you pregnant?” She told me to go into the kitchen, so I did… and once I had, I’d seen that there was the pregnancy test in the oven showing that shit was about to get real.  I am about to Continue Reading →


Posted in Dissapointmentwith 11 comments.

Wanting a Better Life

You’ll have to bear with me for the first few weeks, as there is a lot of ground I want to cover from the last 23 weeks of pregnancy.  Oh yeah… I haven’t even told you guys any of that stuff.  Well our baby is due on May 11th 2014, and we know “it” is a he.  I saw the well endowed sonogram myself! So yeah… 23 weeks.  So to reiterate; I’m going to try to play catch up, and that means these first few posts will not be in any type of chronological order… initially. So I wanted to first get this out of the way.  What kind of dad will I be? I’m sure it’s a topic that will be the most written about in it’s own sense, because we as people live in the unknown.  There’s no possible way for me to know what type of father I’ll be, no mater how many people sneak in the “you’re going to make a wonderful father.”  For me, what continuously fuels this specific thought-engine is my past, and how I was brought up. I was not raised in the Brady Bunch home.  And thankfully not, because I enjoy being the tough, self-reliant, mother effer that I’ve become.  I come from a single mother household, where as much as she’d like to have been in the home with me to see me grow up, she worked multiple jobs to pay the bills.  And while the basic necessities were around, I Continue Reading →


Posted in Fearwith 7 comments.

The First Step…

…and I’m not talking baby steps, although that could be a nice pun to use here as well.  No, I’m talking taking the first step to creating something that could possibly be just a hobby, something that I give up on in a few weeks, or even maybe something that takes off and becomes a part of me. I’ve created a Blog!!! I mentioned in the about me section that, “I wanted to make a space where father’s (and father figures… to not single out the step-dads and moms taking the role of dad) could resort to, just to see that you’re not the only one who’s going through this crazy time in your life called parenthood.  Becoming a father in my 30′s will be a journey many have walked before, but a first for me, and I am excited to share these moments with anyone looking for… just… someone else’s take on what you’re going through too,” and also to “Feel free to comment and leave your own stories, because we can learn from each other, good and bad!”   Well a little more about me to get this introductory blog out of the way; I recently just got married to my female counterpart, and best friend.  We met in high school.  Never dated.  Grew up.  10 years later after I separated from the Marine Corps, were brought together by fate and then started K I S S I N G in a tree… and now she’s pregnant.  Go Continue Reading →


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