A Love Letter to my Wife
On the night of the day dedicated to me, my wife laid next to me motionless and worn out from being up for the last 40 hours prepping for Father’s Day events to follow. As much as I needed to fall asleep 1,000 things flooded my mind, mostly the day that was to follow–when I would have to accompany one of my best friends to a track that had in the past, violently stirred up the pot of his life. As I tried to relax, I mentally went over the techniques that I teach to my clients for relaxation and anxiety relief but they just weren’t working–probably due to the Venti Caramel Mochiatto with 3 extra shots I had earlier in the day. So I pulled my wife closer to me and held her in my arms. I listened to her breathe. I felt her chest rise and fall. She nuzzled deeper into my arms… and I closed my eyes. I thought about writing her a poem. A poem telling her how much I appreciate her and love her. A poem that was cute and cuddly, and a poem that may rekindle our “youth” of when things were a little easier and more free. But then I realized that I just don’t have it in me to write in rhyme anymore. However, I did remember that I’ve created a platform and a following in which I’m able to write and express my thoughts and emotions in a captivating and enticing Continue Reading →
Posted in Parenthood, The Puzzle Piece and tagged father's day, Heartbeat, In-sync, love, love letter, Marriage, Sync, wifewith no comments yet.
The Secret to Parenting…
My son is only going to be 2 years old this May, and I can safely say that I know the secret to being a good parent already… That’s Right! I Said It! …Let me build up to the moment… It’s been a while since I last took some time out of my schedule to sit down and write. I used to find pleasure in writing this blog–not only because I enjoy other people reading my work, but really because I enjoy writing and then getting to look back on the journey I’ve been on as a first time father. But life got in the way. With all the traveling the globe for work, the 16-hour workdays, going to grad school, finishing certification courses, starting my own business, marketing, networking, and everything else that being an adult brings to the table… time spreads extremely thin… extremely fast. I can’t believe how time works. They say “time flies when you’re having fun.” Other known clichés are, “it all happened in a split second,” “in the blink of an eye,” “where did the time go,” or even, “in two shakes of a lambs tail.” The concept that time moves so fast that we are literally unable to piece together the memories of what has happened in the course of it, is sometimes a blessing and a curse. There really isn’t enough time in a day… it truly is the the truest cliché ever created. It’s hard. Being an adult is hard. Being Continue Reading →
Posted in Did He Really Just Say That?, Parenthood, The Puzzle Piece and tagged be a great parent, be present, being a great parent, being present, live, live in the moment, living in the moment, newdad, no time, not enough time, parent, parenting secrets, the secret, the secret of parenting, timewith 2 comments.
Breaking the Parenting Rules
I’ve already broken all kinds of rules that parents follow, such as not taking him out of the house by a certain time. The kid and I went for a walk on day two in the home. Keep the baby out of the sun… well in my mind some sun can’t hurt (plus have you seen how white this kid is)… Keep the house calm and quiet in order to not stress the baby out… We keep the house active and at normal volumes so he can get use to sleeping that way. I’m sure there are many other things that seasoned parents would shun me out of their parent play groups for saying, such as he’s only 5 weeks, and I had him sit in a Bumbo today, or We took him to the zoo when he was shy of 4 weeks old. But the thing is… it’s my turn to learn from my mistakes as every other parent has. So far, I haven’t injured him, and I don’t think I’ve put him in harm (except just being around people in general), but my thoughts are this… if I expose him to as much as possible up front (sounds, colors, smells) then he may develop faster from the different stimuli he’s experiencing… Who knows? Definitely not me…. but it sounds good right? Here’s my main thing… I refuse to be the dad who’s scared to put his son out there. Not in harms way, but just out there for experience. And Continue Reading →
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Eat Sleep Poop… Repeat
Let me start off by saying, this is an amazing feeling. Holding this little person in my arms and being able to calm him down and put him to sleep with my soothing hums or superior swaddle skills… these are the moments that parents constantly talk about. Seeing that face our baby makes when he’s hungry, or his little poop face (that has been referred to as Blue Steel), *Zoolander Reference? Check…* that poop face this kid makes is priceless. I mean seriously… that’s the pose of a natural model… Being a father for 5 weeks, I don’t have answers to all the parenting questions, nor do I have many tips for guys going through what I am at this stage of babyism, but I do already have my own experience. It’s such a very specific experience that I know once we have another baby, that will be a complete separate experience from this experience I’m having right this moment! Still following me? Well I can only explain it in these terms… Babies don’t do much but eat, sleep, poop, and repeat, but since baby JR is our first born, everything we do as parents is brand new. Everything is our first time seeing these actions in action. It’s literally just he, the wife, and I in the house, so all of our attention is on the baby, and so everything is new to us. Breastfeeding, pumping, the new looking poops, belly buttons falling off, baths, laughs, figuring out what calms him down, Continue Reading →
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My Needs, Her Wants…
Need and Want are two totally different words with two totally different meanings. However, as a society, we’ve started mixing the meaning of them up in such a manner, that it’s hard to decipher the difference of the two on an instinctual level, as well as an emotional level. Huh? Well, when a man says “I’m starving,” does he want or need food? Most likely he wants food. The human body actually has enough reserve of fat for energy to last an average man 2 weeks without food as long as he has water… hell Ghandi lasted 21 days. But if you asked that man at 10 pm after a long day of standing in line and chasing children in Disneyland if he was hungry, he’d probably tell you he needs to eat. When a woman says I need a pedicure, or I need to get my hair done, well in her mind, she is so rugged, that she in fact believes her want is a need. But the determination between want and need aren’t so easy sometimes. Sometimes want and need do in fact work hand in hand. For instance when you tell a child, “I need you to understand what I am saying to you” and “I want you to understand me,” that comes from the same place in your heart, where you are overall saying, “what I am saying to you is of the utmost importance… please let this soak in.” Well, I have my wants, and I have my needs, Continue Reading →
Posted in Parenthood, The Puzzle Piecewith 10 comments.